BEWARE: A Very Pissy Rant

Don't say I didn't warn you....I am very pissy. Your official warning is that I may or may not swear in this post. Who knows what will come spewing out of my fingers.... but, you've been warned and I don't wanna hear about it.

So, without giving too many details...how do I do this??

Let me just say that just because you know of someone (not even a good friend by any stretch of the imagination) or your best friends mother's uncle's niece adopted....DO NOT assume that you are an expert in adoption. DO NOT think that it is okay for you to give advice or offer sage wisdom on the topic either. You have zero idea what you are talking about! Do not, for one second, think that you know what a birth mother is looking for in an adoptive couple. You don't know! Most likely, she doesn't even really know until she finds THE ONE! Do not assume you should tell a perspective adoptive couple what they should include in their profile, what pictures should be shared or what they should look like. YOU HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA!!!! Just because you are shallow and straight up lame, does not mean that birth mothers are. Any little comment you say may or may not come across as criticism. And, they will remember FOREVER!! This is not my story to share....but oh my HOLY CRAP I am irked to the core!!! I cannot get it out of my head. Therefore, I blog.

What you should do is just LISTEN to your friend (I know, new concept huh?) . Tell her that "man, that sucks!", "I'm sorry you have to go through this, it must be so hard." etc etc. DO NOT say "that's so great you're adopting...its the latest fad!" cuz um....WTF? or "If you had more faith you would get pregnant." Again....WTF? or "You know, right when you start the paperwork or get a baby, you're gonna get pregnant." Oh really? Cuz you're God and you know? Or do you think that we just wanna hear that? Or does it make you feel better if you give us a "happily ever after" scenario? Guess what....we don't want to hear your condescending bull shit!!! Your intentions may be great (actually, I'm sure they are) but DO NOT SAY IT!!! Speaking from my own experience....I have my "happily ever after". That statement, to me, downplays how great adoption is. It quite frankly, bugs the living bejeezus outta me.

***late side note: this rant is in no way directed toward my family (immediate or extended) or many of my close friends who watched Bubba and I struggle with infertility the last 5 years. I'm not saying you're experts, but you at least know what our experience was like with our Rachel...you know that she did not "pick" us because of the way we looked. I like to think that because you know how hard it was for us not to get pregnant, then our decision to adopt and finally our miracle of Grady...you would be more sensitive to people you may come across who are going through a similar situation. Feel free to let them know our experience and how the pain is worth it in the end. Because, it really is.
***another side note: keep in mind...I'M PISSY!!! I do realize that its been a while since I've had such a "pissy" post, so you may not be accustomed to my "mouth" anymore. I would apologize, but right now I'm just not feelin' it.
***final side note: No, I am not PMSing. This is me genuinely ticked off.